Saturday, August 24, 2013

circles


passing through circles
of weddings and aging and death
i can’t tell where this one ends and
this one begins.

i see my son, my baby
reaching out to his lovely one
and grasping a hand that is not mine
and i decide that i love her too.

i see my mother
reaching out to memory
and grasping things from long ago
and i decide that she’s wiser than me.

i see my brother
reaching out to god
and grasping for something beyond this world
and i decide to someday ask the way
and follow.

these circles cross paths
in ways i cannot comprehend.

i reach out for something less dizzying

and grasp for something more linear

then decide to walk the intersections
as best I can.

Friday, August 23, 2013

just before jimmy died

just before jimmy died
his breathing was only
a habit-
his last addiction.

i whispered into his ear
"it's ok"
and i think i believed it.

i gasped in air with him
until the air stood still.

the moon that night was full and generous-
a quiet friend to keep us company
as we remembered.

i'm remembering now:
the heat rising from his body-
the way the color slipped away with his life-
the way he listened to my voice
from somewhere far away.

i told him where to turn
and he did not hesitate.

i wonder who will draw a map for me
to lead me away from my last breath?

i hope they know more than me.